Marriage is like putting on shoes: the most important thing is that they fit. I am very satisfied with the pair of “shoes” that life has given me.
Before getting married, I had “warned” my boyfriend: if there was no house, I would resolutely not get married! However, when my boyfriend proposed to me, the deep feelings accumulated over the course of our seven years of unwavering love finally won out over the house.
On my 27th birthday, my boyfriend and I entered the marriage hall.
After the wedding, we crowded together with my husband’s parents and younger brother in an old house of just over 70 square meters. We each had a room with our parents, and my brother had to live in the living room. Living with my parents had many inconveniences. Not only did we have to be careful when making out, but we also had to keep our voices down when arguing. When we had a fight, we had to whisper, which was really upsetting. I would sit in the small room sulking and crying, while my husband looked at me with a helpless and guilty expression, like a child who has done something wrong, hanging his head obediently by my side, keeping a low profile. Over time, my in-laws, who had always treated me very well, also sensed my emotional changes. Sometimes they would look apologetic, which made me feel very uncomfortable.
In October 20xx, my husband’s younger brother got married, and we had to rent a house outside. During that period, we suffered a lot from renting: the first time we rented a place, we were robbed and cleaned out before we could stay long; the second time, the place was in a bad neighborhood, and the house was very damp, so our clothes molded within a week; the third time, we rented a wooden house built decades ago, and it caught fire during a short circuit… Meeting mean and snobbish landlords, the humiliation of living under someone else’s roof made my husband and I feel miserable.
In 20xx, five years after we got married, I, who was already 30, decided to have a child. However, we did not want our child to live under someone else’s roof like we did, and we were determined to buy a house even if it meant going into debt!
We emptied our savings over the years and, with some help from our parents, we managed to put down a deposit and take out a bank loan with a repayment period of 20xx. We bought a three-room, 90-square-meter commercial property. After a simple renovation, we moved in. Finally, we had our own home! At that moment, we were so happy that we embraced each other and cried.
Every woman has a beautiful dream. Growing up in a large family, my greatest wish was to have a house of my own, because I always thought that a house was what made a home complete. Four years after our marriage, my dream finally came true, and I became the actual owner of a house.
However, the joy didn’t last long, and we soon felt the financial pressure. My company was laying off employees due to poor performance, and I was pregnant at the time. I was one of the first to be laid off, and I only had 200 yuan a month to live on. My husband’s monthly salary was only a little over 1,000 yuan, and after paying off the bank loan, there was only 200 yuan left. 400 yuan was just enough to live on, and there was nothing left to prepare for the new home and future children. After buying the house, our life entered a state of people’s alternative interpretation of mortgage loans – paying back on time and not being able to make ends meet. The 15th of every month became a sword of Damocles hanging over our heads, as the bank would take away a large portion of our income on this day.
In order to alleviate the financial pressure, my husband took on two part-time jobs in addition to his work.
Life was not affluent, and the financial pressure was great. My dreams of a fancy car and a mansion from my teenage years had long since been shattered. Watching my friends around me frequently change rich boyfriends thanks to their beautiful youth, my mental equilibrium was thrown off. While others were enjoying life, we were working hard for survival.
But when faced with the real temptation of money and material goods, I still hesitated and became timid. The traditional education I received from childhood to adulthood taught me that marriage should be a commitment to stay together through thick and thin. And I know very well that there is no such thing as a free lunch, that if you want something, you have to pay for it. So I returned without hesitation to my own little world, and continued to lead a simple but down-to-earth, warm life. The three of us lived together in plainness, supporting each other, and found joy in life in the midst of the humdrum.
Before we had a house, my rich friends often asked me sympathetically if I was happy with this kind of life. After we got the house, they still asked me the same question, watching us busy running around all day to pay off the mortgage. Every time, I would smile and answer.
In fact, everyone has their own way of life. Whether you are poor or rich is not the key, what matters is whether this way of life suits you. Life is like wearing shoes, and the most important thing is that they fit. I am very satisfied with the “shoes” that life has given me.
Marriage Emotional Story 2: Marriage Microscope
Liang Mian married Shan Yun when he was 40 years old. Shan Yun had fair skin, and in the summer, the puff sleeves of her purple lotus-flower dress revealed lotus-root-like arms. Liang Mian longed to slice those arms into pieces, turn them into water, put them in his pocket, and carry them with him every day.
Liang Mian was a biology expert and often used a microscope to observe his marriage.
Shan Yun went out for a haircut in the evening and was gone for five hours. Liang Mian couldn’t sit still, pacing in front of the barber shop, his eyes fixed on the interior as if they had been pulled taut. The glass door of the barber shop was a microscope, and he saw Shan Yun’s head being cradled in the arms of a young male barber, who was fiddling with it from side to side. Shan Yun’s face actually had an expression of joy, which made Liang Mian angry. After Shan Yun finished getting her hair cut, she didn’t linger, and Liang Mian let out a sigh of relief. He walked out of the darkness, and Shan Yun was startled, and her graceful arm was immediately wrapped around his.
“I had something to pass through here, so I stopped by to pick you up,“ Liang Mian said, pretending to be gentle.
“Oh,” Shan Yun said without pointing it out, only responding lightly.
The car ride home was usually silent. Liang Mian’s expression was peculiar. He liked that Shan Yun was more beautiful, but also wished that she was uglier. Armed with a microscope, he could always see the hidden blemishes in the marriage, like the snowflakes on the screen after the damage to the old movie film.
Shan Yun was a civil servant and sometimes had to attend meetings. The meeting was held at a hotel, and Shan Yun went there gracefully. Liang Mian was a little distracted, so he opened a room next to the hotel conference room. The door to the conference room was half open, and the noisy voices of men and women could be heard inside, one after the other. He pricked up his ears and heard Shan Yun’s voice, which was also one after the other, and his heart became even more disturbed. He used the partition wall as a microscope, but all he could see were two people, a man and a woman. The figure grew larger and larger, and it became heavier and heavier, oppressing him and making him feel ashamed.
Liang Mian rushed out, standing at the door of the meeting room, like a heavily armed policeman, searching his suspect. But the meeting room was extremely quiet, everyone’s expression solemn, sitting upright. Shan Yun saw him, and everyone in the meeting room saw him. Shan Yun’s face was red and white, like pink ice cream, instantly frozen. Her lotus-like arms were twisted together unnaturally, as if she were trying to break them off.
One day, Liang Mian said to her, “Shan Yun, don’t go to work anymore. Stay home and be a full-time housewife. I’ll support you.”
Shan Yun cried. Liang Mian couldn’t bear to see her tears, so he kissed her forehead with his lips. His lips were very thin, and with his strange expression, the kiss was also cold, like a golden handcuff, which hit her forehead with a ‘dang’ sound.
No, I want to go out. Shan Yun looked stubborn. She liked her career, but she liked freedom even more.
Liang Mian’s face showed signs of gloom. Suddenly, there was lightning and thunder. Shan Yun’s arms flailed about, like milk that had been overturned, splashing all over the floor and getting her all muddy.
Outside, it was pouring. Shan Yun ran outside, covering her face, and never returned. She was a cloud on a mountain, preferring misery to captivity. After all, she was free.
Liang Mian was alone at home, and the silence was a little frightening. The snowflakes he had seen through the microscope gradually merged into an endless darkness. With a crunch, everything came to a halt.
Perhaps the film had been pulled too tightly and had snapped.
Marriage and Love Story 3: Love Adventure
When TV shows interview celebrity couples, they often ask: What is your most romantic memory? The answer is often: flying back from the West Coast, having lunch together, and flying back again.
Is this the most romantic? Can it be compared to the following story?
He is a prisoner, behind high walls, and has been for almost 20xx years. He can call the outside world at set times, but he doesn’t know who to call, because the numbers that were once familiar have either been changed or switched off, and almost none of them answer him anymore.
One day he tried to dial a friend’s number, and a female voice came over the line, obviously a wrong number. However, he didn’t want to hang up. The voice was soft and beautiful, and he just listened for a while.
After hanging up, he was actually obsessed with that voice. The next time, he dialed the number again, as if possessed.
This time the girl was annoyed and asked him to stop harassing her, and hung up immediately. He dialed again, but she didn’t answer.
It was lucky for him that one day he couldn’t help but hesitate to dial again, and that day the girl happened to have a pay rise due to her outstanding performance, and she was in a good mood, so she talked to him. They talked until he said, “I’m sorry, my time is up.” The phone disconnected.
What did he mean by “time’s up”? The girl was curious, and she found herself waiting for that mysterious call, whether she meant to or not. When they spoke again, he told her everything about himself. He didn’t want anything, he just wanted to hear her voice, that was all.
She was a kind girl, and she thought that talking on the phone wasn’t a complicated thing. If chatting could give some help and encouragement to someone behind bars, why would she refuse him?
As time went on, she actually became a little dependent on the phone calls. If the agreed-upon time passed without a call, she would feel restless.
I can understand the reason for this – he was devoted to her with his whole heart. In this day and age, can you still find someone who is devoted to you with their whole heart?
She went to visit him, waiting for him to be released after serving his sentence. Now, they have formed a happy little family and have children.
At the time, everyone around her said she was crazy. Except for the relationship. What does he have? It’s too risky.
I once interviewed a couple who had been married for 60 years. They had eloped to Yan’an during the war, and they were still as sweet as ever. What is romance? Taking risks is romantic. Today’s young people think that the love of their elders is unromantic, with neither sports cars for joyrides nor diamond wedding rings to sparkle. In fact, it is the marriages of today that lack the most romance, because people dare not take risks.
But is a marriage that dares not take risks really that safe?
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